Gravity: A Must See!

After an accident leaves them adrift in space, medical engineer Ryan Stone and astronaut Matt Kowalski must work together to not only survive, but get back to earth.

To say that Gravity was an intense film experience is to make an understatement of epic proportions. There are only a few moments during the film (the opening scenes, which set the stage for the chaos that is to come), in which the audience can breath and relax. But once the first incident takes place, they will be lucky if they can catch their breath again as they are twisted and turned upside-down and right-side up, usually through the eyes of Ryan (played by Sandra Bullock) as she and Matt (played by George Clooney) try to survive. There were so many close calls and jaw-dropping moments that it is hard to imagine any other film this year (or for a while going forward) making the audience's palms as sweaty and also making them unknowingly duck and move from side to side in a vain attempt to help Ryan and Matt dodge more space debris or hang on before they drift away into deep space. Director Alfonso Cuaron is to be commended for creating a space-based film that truly felt like it was shot in space (I know how silly that sounds but trust me, if you see it in IMAX 3D, it's almost like being there). George Clooney was..., well to borrow a line from a previous review I did on a film he starred in, George Clooney, with all of the swagger and coolness one would expect. Sandra Bullock gave a tremendous performance that is sure to make people think about her as something more than the "girl next door" character she always seemed to play in all of those romantic comedies she starred in. She was tough, resourceful, relatable and her journey provided the emotional anchor to the film, giving the audience a reason to root for her to keep going and try to make it back to earth.

Films like Gravity are an absolute delight to watch for it was able to do something most other movies nowadays are not able to, entertain us, giving us something so breathtaking, terrifying and ultimately satisfying that we are able to truly escape from our everyday lives and slip into a world that reminds us that for all of the terror, misfortunate and heartache we face, the human spirit and will can overcome anything.

Grade: A

Pacific Rim: Giant Robots, Giant Monsters, Giant disappointment

Earth is being attacked by giant creatures known as Kaiju, which rise out of the sea and wreak havoc. To fight these monsters, humanity creates Jaegers, giant robots with unmatched weaponry and strength. But will these machines, and the pilots who control them, be able to stop the Kaiju from annihilating humankind?

Thinking of this film in terms of its action, my buddy David astutely described it as, “Voltron vs. Godzilla.” It was essentially giant robots fighting giant monsters (none of which, thankfully, were men in rubber suits). And even though the action was repetitive and overwhelming at times, the sequences provided enough thrills, bombast and suspense to keep the audience intrigued.

Where Director Guillermo Del Toro failed was in giving the audience a story and characters that they could relate to or care about on any kind of emotional level. That was disappointing, because he had the perfect plot device to do so (I’ll try to explain without giving too much of the plot away). It takes two people/pilots to operate those massive Jaegers and in order to do so, the pilots must sync up their minds, opening themselves up to one another’s memories, thoughts, etc. The hero of the film, Raleigh (played by Charlie Hunnam) is mentally scarred due to a terrifying event that took place the last time he piloted a Jaeger. His new co-pilot, Mako (played by the beautiful Rinko Kikuchi) is also scarred due to a past experience with a Jaeger and a Kaiju. Rather than taking the screen time to show these two building their relationship and leaning to trust each other in and outside of the Jaeger, Del Toro forced more fight sequences down the audience’s collective throats and included a ridiculous sub-plot involving a lame, comedic relief scientist (played with the utmost annoyance by Charlie Day) who was trying to figure out how the Kaiju could be stopped. As a result, the budding relationship/romance between Raleigh and Mako felt forced (as only Hollywood can do) and the ending of the film lacked the emotional punch that it could have had if the studio had spent less on CGI and more on a script.

Pacific Rim is a big, loud blast of a summer popcorn flick, it’s just too bad the story did not match all of that action.

GRADE: C

John Carter: A continuation of Taylor Kitsch's bad summer

Civil War veteran John Carter finds himself transported to Mars, where he becomes entangled in a different civil war between the inhabitants of the planet. He must decide if he will help the Martian Princess or simply continue to drift through life as he was doing back on Earth.

At this point, you almost feel bad for Taylor Kitsch. Both of the major summer blockbusters he has starred in (this one and Battleship) have lost their respective studios money and were soundly drubbed by film critics. However John Carter, like Battleship, was not such a horrible movie. The story, while overburdened with an excess of useless subplots, cutesy Disney moments and unnecessary characters, was accessible enough for the audience so they could at least have a basic understanding of what was happening on screen (i.e. John needed to unite two of the warring factions against the third in order to save the planet and rescue the beautiful Martian Princess). The action became repetitive (yes, we know John can jump really high, that was clear the tenth time we saw it on screen!) but it was palpable and kept the audience engaged. Kitsch tried his best to play up John as an anti-hero who was torn between those incidents which broke him back on Earth and the need to become the warrior and leader he seemed destined to become, and there were some scenes which were effective (the part where there are cuts between a battle sequence and John burying his family comes to mind) but there were some points where he just seemed lost and looked more like Abercrombie & Fitch model who accidentally wondered unto the set. The rest of the cast failed to rise above the mediocre dialogue and character development provided to them by the cliched script.

It is never going to be considered a classic or even a great sci-fi fantasy film but John Carter is not the most horrible way to spend two hours of your life.

Grade: C

Act of Valor: Real action with real American heroes

After a covert CIA operative is kidnapped by a dangerous terrorist cell a group of Navy SEALs is dispatched to rescue her. They discover that her kidnapping was part of a bigger terrorist threat, one that looks to inflict terrifying damage to the United States.

What sets Act of Valor apart from other Hollywood action films is the fact that the leading and supporting roles are played by active duty Navy SEALs. This fact certainly aided in the films' action sequences, which were tense and stunning. Since there were no "actors" playing the lead and supporting roles, and the filmmakers chose to shoot the film in a documentary - style fashion, one could not help but feel as though they were on the ground with the SEALs fighting terrorists or rescuing the kidnapped CIA operative. The language used, the equipment and weaponry employed all added a touch of realism that made the action all the more impactful and real. Where the film lost steam was when the SEALs were asked to act. The way they delivered their lines when they were discussing things other than the mission left much to be desired (but one honestly cannot fault them for that, after all they are not trained actors). The clunky script and predictable story did not help matters either.

The film was never going to blow the audience away with Oscar worthy performances by the cast or dazzle critics with the complexity and depth of its story. It was a film which tried to give the audience a realistic look at the actions, emotions and sacrifices made by real soldiers every day. Act of Valor did that.

Grade: C+

Underworld: Awakening - Watch it for Kate Beckinsale, that's about it.

After escaping from a long confinement Selene returns to lead her fellow vampires against a new deadly threat, humans.

As a fan of the first two Underworld films (fyi, the third one was just awful), I was pumped to see Kate Beckinsale was returning for the fourth in the series to reprise her role as Selene. Aside from pulling off the bad ass action heroine part of the role, she has also always brought a depth and believability to Selene which added to those first two Underworld films and made them something more than low-rent action popcorn flicks. Beckinsale certainly delivered again in Underworld: Awakening, kicking lycan butt, looking absolutely beautiful while doing so and still giving the role the believability it needed. What was missing from Awakening was any semblance of a serious story or an inkling of character development amongst the rest of the cast. It is true that the first two Underworld films' stories were not exactly Shakespearian in nature, but they at least contributed to the films. With Awakening, there was no substantive plot/story. It felt as though what was there plot/story-wise was filler until the next action sequence came roaring along. Ultimately, the lack of story or characters hurt the film and made it completely forgettable as soon as one pressed "stop" on their remote.

Action junkies can rejoice, Underworld: Awakening delivered all of the vampire vs. lycan battles and slo-mo shootouts that they would expect from a film in this series. But it lacked the story, characters and other elements to make it anything more than a loud, unremarkable sequel.

Grade: C-

Red Tails: George Lucas strikes again (and not in a good way)!

A group of African American pilots, who were part of the Tuskegee Airmen training program, are finally given the chance to engage in aerial combat over the skies of Europe during World War II.

You knew that since this film had George Lucas as its executive producer and it was being produced by Lucasfilm, the CGI and action sequences were going to look and sound amazing. In those aspects, Red Tails did not disappoint as the dogfights, bomber runs and other aerial action kept the audience engaged and intently watching the exploits of the squadron. However, the story and characters tried too hard to fit into the mold of all of those other Hollywood war films and came off as cliched and uninteresting. Films like Glory, which examined the first black regiment in the Civil War, worked so well because the ferocious action on the screen was accentuated by the thought-provoking storytelling and dynamic acting. With Red Tails, the story seemed out of focus, trying to deal with so many insipid and unnecessary subplots, and the characters failed to add anything more than mediocre performances.

If the story could have been reigned in to focus specifically on the bonds between the pilots and show their struggles in combat, as well as in facing bigotry from their own white counterparts, perhaps Red Tails would have been more than a standard war film which never distinguished itself from the rest.

Grade: D+

Prometheus: It's kinda like a prequel...maybe?

Elizabeth Shaw believes she has found a clue to the origin of man. Together with other scientists and explorers she travels to the far reaches of the universe and discovers a planet that might hold the answers she seeks. But what they find on that planet could not only lead to her destruction, but that of all life on Earth.

So what should one expect from Prometheus? First and foremost, it was a visual feast. Director Ridley Scott filled every frame of the film with so many interesting things (landscapes, cool tech/gadgets, spaceships, etc.) that it was next to impossible to not keep one's eyes glued to the screen (if you have the chance to see it in IMAX 3D, I highly recommend it). Scott was also able to squeeze out as much suspense and thrills as possible  in order to keep the audience at the collective edges of their seats. While not equaling Alien in this regard, Prometheus certainly held its own against other recent science fiction films. Noomi Rapace, Michael Fassbender and Charlize Theron also provided tremendous turns in their individual roles. Where the film faltered was in its story, which aimed high content-wise, but failed to deliver any real answers to the heavy handed questions it posed. The story did not concern a bunch of space truckers being chased on their ship by a big, nasty nightmare of a xenomorph, rather it pondered just where we as humans came from (against the back drop of a number of nasty things attempting to harm the human protagonists). Were we created by the Engineers (the beings that Shaw and her co-horts discover on the planet)? If so, who or what created them? These are questions that can be tackled/explored within a science fiction film, but the script just posed them and never presented the audience with an opportunity to get enough information to come to their own conclusions. This, along with unexceptional dialogue and the fact that the story was extremely difficult to follow, left the audience feeling alienated (no pun intended) and wanting everything in the film to be just as spectacular as all of the amazing visuals they were seeing on screen.

It's funny but while getting ready to go to the theater and check out Prometheus I found myself thinking, "it's going to be great to finally see a good sequel in the Alien film series." However after the credits started rolling, I realized that my attitude (which I am sure was shared by Alien fans), was the wrong one to have. It is true that there are certain links to the original Alien universe in Prometheus (Weyland Yutani remains an evil corporation, androids are nefarious and dark haired heroines kick butt), but this film is done almost a disservice by the weighty expectations fans of the series have unfairly placed upon it.

Prometheus was not another Alien, which may be disappointing to some, but its visual flair and solid acting made it a worthy companion piece to the series.

Grade: B-

Battleship: Seriously, you could do worse

While participating in International Naval war games in Hawaii, a fleet of ships run into an alien armada who intend to conquer the earth. The ships and their respective crews must work together in order to stop this from happening.

A movie based off of a board game seems like a silly idea on paper and director Peter Berg's Battleship certainly does nothing to curb that line of thinking for it was a loud, inane summer popcorn action flick with barely enough story and character to make it sub-standard at best. It is not the worst thing to come out of Hollywood in recent years, in fact, the action and special effects looked and sounded great (guess they spent some of that purported $200 million dollar budget on something worthwhile, too bad it wasn't a script) but there was nothing beyond those special effects and action sequences to give the film life or intelligence. This lack of story, plot, or characters has led many critics to make comparisons of Battleship to the Transformers films (which, oddly enough are produced also by Hasbro). Critics have long chided the director the Transformers films, Michael Bay, for perpetuating the effects laden/story lacking films that Hollywood seems to turn out anymore. In some ways, they are right to do so. The Transformers film series peaked with the original in regards to presenting a whole film, with story and characters to go along with the special effects, and the only reason that happened was Bay had to establish the characters that were going to be around for those two sequels (well, Megan Fox only did one more but I don't think her "acting" ability was missed in the third one). The sequels were either brainless (Transformers 2) or had such stunning special effects, no one seemed to care about the terrible acting or story. Battleship felt like a mash up between those two films, it had a poorly constructed story with holes in the plot big enough to sail a destroyer through and a lead actor in Taylor Kitsch who lacked the screen presence (or acting chops in general) to lead a big budget summer film. Still, those special effects and other visual goodies (to go along with a twist at the climax of the film which featured some real American heroes) throughout provided enough entertainment to at least keep the audience engaged.

Don't believe the hype, Battleship wasn't so terrible that you won't be entertained at some points, it just lacked the intelligence and story to make it anything more than a brainless summer popcorn action flick.

Grade: C- 

Apollo 18: Cool concept, boring film

According to official reports, the last mission to the moon by the United States was Apollo 17. But the recent discovery of footage of classified mission following 17 shows that United States astronauts returned to the moon, and came across something that guaranteed we would never go back.

The parade of found footage/documentary style horror films continues (thanks Netflix for sending me this one (he says sarcastically)) with Apollo 18. And while it suffered from the same lack of character development and sustainable plot/story as The Devil Inside, it featured a number of truly terrifying moments which were amplified by the director's use of the desolate landscape and isolated atmosphere of the moon. It's true that the audience never really got to know the astronauts (to be perfectly honest, each of them had the personality of a wet rag), and perhaps if there were some kind of conflict between Nate, Ben and John the story might have been more interesting, but at least when creepy things started happening on the moon's surface it was easy to get the prickly sensations going up and down one's spine and start to wonder just what kind of fate was waiting for the men of the Apollo 18 mission. These few tense moments were the only things that made the film somewhat watchable.

The atmosphere and look of Apollo 18 certainly helped to make its scares all the more frightening, it's just too bad its story and characters failed to add any value to the film as a whole. 

Grade: D+

The Devil Inside: Save yourself some time and go rent The Exorcist

Four years after her mother killed three clergy people, Isabella travels to Italy to visit her. She is convinced that her mother's actions were not her own four years ago and, with the help of two young priests, she hopes to cure her.

Fashioning itself in the same vein as other recent horror films such as The Blair Witch Project and Paranormal Activity, The Devil Inside presented its story with a documentary/found footage feeling that was meant to keep the audience on edge, wondering if what they were watching was staged or perhaps real. There were points in the film where what was happening to Isabella, Ben and the other characters could certainly make the audience jump, squirm or just shift around in their chair for it was unnerving and disturbing but the filmmakers failed to develop the story into anything more than a series of random scares. They raised the question of, is exorcism real or just mental illness but never bothered to explore it further and fold that into Isabella's quest to understand her mother's condition. Then there was the ending, which was wholly unsatisfying and seemed extremely lazy on the part of director William Brent Bell.

Ultimately, The Devil Inside was nothing more than a schlocky, exploitative horror film that did little more than utilize all the things previously seen in other "exorcism" films (i.e. women tied to beds, speaking in tongues and saying things that would make most sailors blush) without ever distinguishing itself from them. 

Grade: D

Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol: Your mission, should you choose to accept, is to check this film out!

Agent Ethan Hunt returns to face another terrifying threat. After the IMF is shut down and implicated in the bombing of the Kremlin, Hunt and the members of his new team must go rogue to hunt down a dangerous terrorist named Hendricks who is not only responsible for framing them for the bombing, but also plans to launch a nuclear strike on the United States.

From the moment it starts, the film barley lets off the gas, giving the audience a multitude of amazing action sequences, car chases, tense moments, close calls and laughs. In comparison to the last couple of Mission Impossible films, this one felt more in line with the set up and spirit of the original television series. There were plenty of cool gadgets and other technology used by Ethan and his team but not so much that they overwhelmed the story. The most refreshing aspect to this chapter in the Mission Impossible film series (and the thing that spurred the comment about a return to the spirit of the original television series) was the fact that the story was not all about Ethan. It is true that he was the main hero of the film (I mean, Cruise did produce it so it's only right), but he was dependent upon the rest of the team to help him stop Hendricks and foil his nefarious plan of nuclear armageddon. Each one of the team members (which included Jeremy Renner, Paula Patton and the always hilarious Simon Pegg) was able to provide a terrific performance. Heck, Cruise even provided a very effective turn as Ethan, giving him an emotional depth and maturity that seemed to be missing from the previous Mission Impossible films.

Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol pulled out all of the stops to not only be a thrilling action film but also distinguish itself from the other films in the series. The result was a terrifically entertaining blast of action flick goodness that everyone will enjoy.

Grade: B+ 

The Muppets: A perfect family movie

When Kermit and the rest of the Muppets learn their beloved theater is slated for demolition so the evil Tex Richman can take all of the oil underneath it, they team up with their new friends Gary and Walter to do one more show in order to raise enough money to save it.

In a world full of unnecessary remakes, daft films about vampires that glitter in the sun (yes, I took a cheap shot at the Twilight series) and other puerile junk that lack any redeeming value of any type, it's hard to find a film that is not only able to entertain an audience, but also just make them feel good once the end credits start rolling. A film that can make one laugh, think and (maybe even) cry due to its sincerity and simple message. Thankfully, The Muppets provided all of those things and more. The story of Kermit and the rest of the gang getting together to do one last show in order to save their theater was not meant to blow people away with a complex plot, abundant special effects or excessive amounts of inappropriate humor (that's not to say there weren't hilarious parts throughout because there were plenty of those), rather it simply wanted to show that if one believed in themselves as well as their friends, anything (including defeating an evil oil tycoon in Tex Richman), is possible. I think we live in such a cynical age anymore that messages like that get lost in the overwhelming swirl of reality television, the internet or any of the other modern trappings that seem to rule our lives. Hopefully children who view this movie will take this lesson to heart, and their parents (or any other adults, teenagers, etc.) will as well.

The Muppets was a fun movie that not only kept the audience laughing, singing and smiling, but also delivered the kind of message that made a person feel good walking out of the theater or pressing stop on the blu-ray player.

Grade: A

Immortals: Not the Sword and Sandal Epic You Were Hoping For

The evil King Hyperion hopes to find an ancient mystical weapon that will help him free the dreaded Titans and overpower the Gods. Standing in his way is Theseus, a mortal man chosen by the Gods to stop him.

In their quest to give the audience the kind of slo-mo, ultra brutal action that helped to make "300" such a memorable film, director Tarsem Singh and the rest of the production team forgot a couple of very important things, namely a viable story and believable characters. The story of Theseus had the chance to be one of inspiration, showing the audience that even a mortal man could make a difference against a great evil. Instead, Tarsem and the screenwriters felt it was more important to simply overwhelm the story with action sequences that were a little too similar to "300" (and not nearly as visceral or thrilling) and a plethora of bland characters. Henry Cavill certainly gave his all in the part of Theseus and made his best efforts to keep the audience interested in what was happening on screen but the rest of the cast was either sadly under-utilized (seriously Freida Pinto could have done so much more than stare longingly at Henry), woefully miscast (Mickey Rourke as a King? Not buying it, even for a second), excessively whiny (Luke Evans played Zeus as if he were a bratty teenager) or were just there to take up space.

By the time the film was over, and all of the visual flair and pseudo-extravagant action had finished, one almost forgot just what Immortals was about for it had no real story or characters, making it just another "300" wannabe.

Grade: D+ 

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo: If you think the poster is shocking, just wait till you watch the film!

Disgraced journalist Mikael Blomkvist is hired by a wealthy businessman to investigate the disappearance of his grandniece. However she disappeared over forty years ago and the trail is somewhat cold, so he begins working with an investigator named Lisabeth. Together they uncover clues that could not only lead them to the grandniece, but also shed light on a series of murders with possible connections to her disappearance.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo was not an easy film to watch. The gritty crime thriller, directed by one of the modern American auteurs in David Fincher and based off of the international best selling novel of the same name by Stieg Larsson, deals with Mikael and Lisabeth's investigation of  a girl's disappearance forty years ago. Along the way, they encounter a number of unsavory characters trying to hinder their attempts to uncover the truth. These unsavory characters, and the dilemmas they present to Mikael and Lisabeth, are what make for some of the more intense scenes of the film (those scenes between Lisabeth and you court appointed guardian Nils are almost unbearable, especially for women). Fincher never shied away from showing these things on screen, but he also never overindulged in the gritty stuff, thereby making those scenes all the more effective and shocking. Those scenes serve specific purposes to the film as a whole and are therefore integral.

The mystery the duo are trying to solve was complex and overwhelming at points, given the long list of suspects as well as the cryptic clues, but this only served to reel the audience in deeper into the film. Fincher was also able to lean on his actors to draw the audience in emotionally. Daniel Craig was sturdy and believable as Mikael, giving him a more physical presence than Michael Nyqvist did when he played the part in the Swedish version of the film. Rooney Mara was an absolute revelation as Lisabeth. She was haunting and delicate at points but able to turn into a fierce women who was ready to fight in an instant. It was impossible to take one's eyes off of her when she was on screen for you never knew what she was going to do. Individually, these two were interesting enough but when they joined up to work together and solve the mystery, it was beyond fascinating to watch. Their scenes together were played with an appealing awkwardness that kept the audience wondering just what was developing between the two of them.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo was a classic who-dunnit thriller with an entertaining edge sorely missing in most Hollywood films nowadays.

Grade: A

The Adventures of Tintin: A serviceable adventure

World famous reporter Tintin and his trusty dog Snowy stumble into an adventure after he purchases a mysterious old model of a ship called the Unicorn. Along the way he must escape from the nefarious Sakharine and help Captain Haddock find his ancestors' missing treasure.

There certainly was plenty of adventure and excitement to be had in the film. Director Steven Spielberg tried to craft the title character into an Indiana Jones - like hero, putting him into dangerous situations in which he had to use his wits (and his muscle) to escape. However, if you took away the motorcycle chases, narrow escapes, and other action sequences the film essentially fell flat as its story and characters were dull and bland. One of the most glaring missteps was the fact that the audience was never given Tintin's backstory. It is explained that he is a famous reporter but that was it. It's understood that, to keep the flow of the story going, there was no need to spend a half and hour explaining how Tintin got his start as a reporter, how he found Snowy or how his hair is able to maintain its shape while he is dodging bullets but little nuggets of information here and there would have helped. The story seemed to focus more on Captain Haddock and his tale of redemption. And while that served to provide the audience with a valuable life lesson, the rest of the film was cheapened by poor storytelling and bad humor that lessened its potential impact.

The Adventures of Tintin contained breathtaking animation and enough excitement to keep audience members of all ages engrossed but it lacked the solid storytelling of those classic Disney Pixar films.

Grade: C

The Thing: Too bad it couldn't have cloned itself into a better film!

After an alien spacecraft is discovered in Antarctica, a team of scientists is dispatched to investigate it. However when the alien life form which was on board the craft is accidentally unthawed, the scientists must find a way to not only stay alive, but defeat the evil visitor.

There is little question that fans of John Carpenter's The Thing (for which this film is a prequel) are not going to be as enthusiastic with director Matthijis van Heijningen Jr.'s take. Carpenter's film was built on the tension and paranoia inherent in the story (who can you trust if the alien can clone itself into anyone?). He seized upon that to create a classic sci-fi thriller with a solid story, terrific acting and amazing special effects. This new "Thing" had its moments of tension and thrills, but never took enough time to utilize the stories' source material (the film is based upon a short story called, "Who Goes There?" by John W. Campbell Jr.) and make the film the kind of intense thrill ride that Carpenter's was. Instead, Heijningen Jr. focused more on the violence inflicted by the alien and all of the cool new ways he could show it via CGI as opposed to the practical effects used in the original. The results, however, were less than remarkable and the alien looked like something one would see in a SyFy channel movie, not a big budget studio film. The acting by the cast also did little to help the film, although one wishes that more development would have gone into Mary Elizabeth Winstead's character Kate. She was the only one of the cast that felt believable and it seemed as though the filmmakers were trying to make her Ripley-esque (Ripley is the heroine played by Sigourney Weaver in the "Alien" film series), by giving her a flame-thrower at the climax of the film and asking her to be a woman of action, not a shrinking violet that needed to be saved by a man. Alas there was little to no depth to her and when the film ended, it was easy to feel indifferent as to the fate of Kate.

The newest version of The Thing had a lot to live up to given the reverence that the original carries amongst fans and critics, unfortunately it failed to match the original in any way and was an underwhelming experience.

Grade: C-

Pirates of the Caribbean 4: On Stranger Tides

Captain Jack Sparrow finds himself on a quest to help a woman from his past named Angelica find the Fountain of Youth. But they are not the only ones pursuing this fabled treasure, and Jack must use all of his wits to not only find the fountain, but survive the likes of his old nemesis Barbossa, the Spanish, and Blackbeard.

If there was one thing most fans would expect from this fourth installment of the Pirates series, it was that Johnny Depp would once again provide a memorable/hilarious performance as the lovable Captain Jack Sparrow. Unfortunately, his Sparrow this time around was tired and haggard, much like the film itself. There were still bits and spurts of the usual Sparrow-esque hilarity but Depp looked weary and restrained, simply going through the motions in order to cash another large check from the Disney company. The rest of the cast failed to add any sort of noteworthy turn (the chemistry between Depp and Penelope Cruz was non-existent and Ian McShane's Blackbeard was never given the chance to do anything but stare menacingly at the other actors) and, quite frankly, the presences of Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley were sorely missed. The story was a convoluted mess that tried too hard to be as clever as any of the three previous films but even if it succeeded in grabbing the audience's attention, the characters were so lifeless and uninteresting no one in said audience would care about what was happening on the screen. Oddly enough a movie about pirates was missing naval battles, it was also lacking in time spent by the characters on actual boats. While there were a couple of solid action pieces sprinkled throughout the film (the most intense and exhilarating of which was the mermaid attack on the crew, the mermaids in the "Pirates" universe are a whole lot scarier than any other mermaid one has been exposed to), a naval battle or two would have added some more excitement, which this fourth installment seemed to be lacking.

If you are a completest and have already seen the first three Pirates films, chances are you will be able to find Pirates of the Caribbean 4: On Stranger Tides somewhat watchable but everyone else would be wise to stay away from this lackluster sequel.

Grade: C-

Attack the Block: (or not)

When a group of extraterrestrials invades a South London neighborhood, a teen gang decides to take up arms in order to fight them. But they soon learn that this is a task that is easier said than done.

Attack the Block certainly put a different spin on the alien invasion film, showing the audience what would happen if aliens invaded the "wrong part" of South London but it's too bad the members of the teen gang that decided to take them on was such a group of unlikable characters that "Attack" never amounted to anything other than a daft waste of time. Moses, Pest, Biggz and the rest of the bunch were the kind of kids that you hope your own children never turned out to be. They smoked weed, cursed and were always in troubled with the law, as such only 16 to 18 year old boys could relate to them while the rest of the audience found them to be vulgar and boorish. When the audience cannot relate to or emotionally connect with the protagonists of the film, then it really just becomes an exercise of watching the clock and hoping the film ends sooner rather than later so they get on to more interesting things (as it was with this film).

Obnoxious characters, flat jokes and an insipid story are what you can expect if you decide to watch Attack the Block.

Grade: D

Drive: Buckle up for one hell of a ride!

A mysterious man known only as Driver works as a Hollywood stuntman by day and a getaway driver at night. His isolated life is interrupted when he falls for his new neighbor and is further complicated when his boss indirectly gets him involved with some shady characters.

Drive is one of those films you either love or hate, there is no in between. Those that hate it will point to the lack of sustained action, lack of an abundance of dialogue and an unsatisfying ending as the reasons for their dislike. They feel as though the film is unworthy of the hype that has been put upon it by critics. However these detractors are missing the things that make Drive worth that hype and definitely worth at least one viewing.

First, there is action, and plenty of it! Director Nicolas Winding Refn did not overwhelm the audience with fist-fights and multi-car pile ups, but used what action was there to punctuate the story of Driver (yes, that is the name of Ryan Gosling's character). Next there was the dialogue and acting. Winding Refn was able to let his actors grow into their roles, giving them a depth that most action thriller characters sorely lack. And while it is true that critical parts of the movie could be considered dialogue-lite, the performances by Gosling, Carey Mulligan, Albert Brooks and the rest of the cast were spot on and effective, giving the audience more than enough to emotionally invest in what was taking place on screen. Also, there is something to be said about how less might be more in regards to dialogue. Too often, it seems, filmmakers choose to inundate the audience with an overabundance of dialogue when two or three lines are more efficient. An example of this in Drive was near the end of the film when Driver called Irene to confess his feelings for her. Rather than laying on the full blown uber-sweet romantic drivel so readily employed by most filmmakers, Winding Rifn and screenwriter Hossein Amini kept it simple and honest (and they kept that bit of dialogue to two or three lines). The affect was more heart-wrenching than anything a long two minutes of fluff could produce. Finally, there were the foreign film sensibilities Winding Rifn imbued in the film. Scenes were allowed to develop rather than being jammed down the audiences throat with no rhyme nor reason to them and each shot was so full of meaning and metaphor that one just wanted to keep watching. Director of Photography Newton Thomas Sigel was able to give the movie a distinct look (glossy, 1980's slick are the best phrases to describe it) that added to its overall appeal.

Drive was a unique take on the action thriller, a film which was not afraid to bypass some of the tired conventions of the genre in order to give the audience a smart, artsy, thrilling rush of a ride.

Grade: A

Contagion: You will want to wash your hands after this one!

As  a deadly outbreak of an infectious disease threatens to annihilate mankind a global team of doctors and scientists struggle to not only discover where the disease came from, but also how to stop it.

The first half of Contagion leaves one absolutely petrified. Director Steven Soderbergh essentially dropped the audience right into the action as they are introduced to Beth Emhoff (Gwyneth Paltrow), barely given the chance to know who she is or anything about her before she experiences a seizure and dies from the mysterious disease which subsequently starts taking lives all over the world. It was the cold, almost documentary-like style in which Soderbergh shot this, and the realistic reactions taken by the men and women of the various health organizations (a cadre of mega movie stars including Laurence Fishburne, Kate Winslet and others), that could not help but send shivers down the audience member's spines (and have them reaching for a bottle of Purell, as they remembered all the things they touched the last time they were in public). Soderbergh was able to leverage the audience's own fears of a virus like the one in the film possibly appearing in real life and utilized it to  make that first half of the film more horrifying than any slasher film Hollywood has put out in a long time.

It was in the last half of the film when Contagion seemed to loose steam as the plots and sub-plots wore the narrative too thin, pulling the audience in too many different directions. There was no way that the suspense and terror so readily available in the first part of the film could have been sustained for the entire running time but it almost felt like, after a certain point, Soderbergh and screenwriter Scott Z. Burns decided to stop pressing on driving the important parts of the story such as the cure being administered to the survivors as well as the how and whys as to the origin of the virus (the origin was explained/shown but almost as an afterthought near the conclusion of the film) and tried to tie up all of the uninteresting/unimportant threads of the story.

For a good hour or so Contagion gave one an all too realistic look at the world should it ever face a viral epidemic, it's just a shame it could not provide a worthy conclusion to that terrifying start.

Grade: C+